If you looked up 16-17 year old me in the dictionary you would find Soundgarden.

Chris Cornell, rest peacefully free from rusty cages.

Troubling to think about all the stuff I’ve forgotten or the OS has deleted from mind.

And it’s not cool actually it stings my head to stare directly at a piece of art not knowing who painted it but knowing without doubt that I used to know. To address that I don’t anymore know how to pronounce Thich Nhat Hanh is hard.

I’m not talking so much about memories or experiences, those I’m remarkably good at recalling to this point. And band names I’m still holding on to hard but even some of those are getting deleted. I try to grow my OS and make more space     but I know it is limited and some stuff must go.

It makes sense but is still so weird to look right at it and remember it but not remember it.

New life.

10 – 15 is about how long I can stand listening to myself.

But I could listen for days to how ball players picked their number, or their number picked them.

You see I could tell you about my day

but it was the drive home that was it  –>  from the start

with the wedding dress statue lady on first corner

followed by a way late pedestrian (rare here)   & quickly

three very grown men blowing big bubbles across Railroad

one of which I caught out the window by hand,

then a detour but no one was working   &

thought I saw Paul walking by St. Paul’s but it wasn’t him

yet he made me look up seeing a lone popped wheelie   &

“running man” slowly ran by

the bay   –>

it was weird because the rest of the ride seemed pretty much normal ’till

I pulled in to see the gift of several major trees/limbs that needed attention now majorly altered by professionals with skills,

the sun hit my cheek   pull the brake.

See I could tell you about my day but it’s only happening right now.

I already knew this but am just learning some things that were funny at 20 are not at 40.

&

realizing these days some things that were funny yesterday are already not today.

&

understood but it’s just sinking in how special it is to be forever funny.

The magic just sits there with its hat.

I want to tap in and learn the next illusion or just play with dice.  It’s so hard but I have to hold off and wait patiently because I’m alone.

It wouldn’t be right without Tayen the Great.  It wouldn’t be fair. Fact it wouldn’t even be fun. Without her it’s just a box of stuff–>  nothing magical at all.

1. An imperfect or even unstable person or band of persons can still create something that helps others be more perfect or stable.

I Think.

times I don’t understand ’em, others I do.